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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23113660">Hot Milfs in Your Area</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/FrenchTwistResistance/pseuds/FrenchTwistResistance'>FrenchTwistResistance</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>I’ve Always Been Crazy But It’s Kept Me from Going Insane [15]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Chilling Adventures of Sabrina (TV 2018)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/F, I just want caos to be a sitcom where hot middle-aged ladies kiss</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 16:03:08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,162</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23113660</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/FrenchTwistResistance/pseuds/FrenchTwistResistance</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Hilda stars in a local theatre production, and Lilith is in the audience.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Hilda Spellman/Mary Wardwell | Madam Satan | Lilith</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>I’ve Always Been Crazy But It’s Kept Me from Going Insane [15]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1597594</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Hot Milfs in Your Area</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It’s coming to the end of their two and half hours on their third Tuesday, and as Hilda had predicted—just a little later than she’d anticipated—Lilith had finally started complaining about the velvet armchair and has now insinuated herself into the big leather desk chair, half on Hilda’s lap.</p><p>They’ve got the typewriter reassembled and mostly working, just a lot of small adjustments yet, and of course it needs a fresh ink ribbon.</p><p>Lilith stands and stretches. Hilda wonders if that’s necessary. She suspects it’s for show, so that Hilda will look at her. Or maybe it just feels good. Lilith has proven quite the hedonist, after all.</p><p>Lilith says,</p><p>“We’re so nearly finished. Maybe we could squeeze in another hour later this week and knock it out?”</p><p>Hilda also stands and stretches. Hers is necessary. She’s got a crick in her neck something fierce. She mentally runs through her schedule.</p><p>“Sorry. I don’t think I’ve got any time, love.” She leans against the edge of the desk and watches Lilith watch her. Lilith says,</p><p>“But you usually have Thursdays free after Beer and Books…?”</p><p>“Yes, usually. But this Thursday is dress rehearsal for Into the Woods.”</p><p>“Excuse me, what? As in ‘into the woods and out of the woods and home before dark’?”</p><p>“Exactly that.”</p><p>Lilith’s gaze sharpens and questions. Hilda says,</p><p>“Surely I told you. Dr. Cee and I do community theatre together, and our opening is this weekend.”</p><p>Lilith purses her lips, says,</p><p>“No, you haven’t mentioned that. I guess I should know I’m not your only companion, and probably not even in your top five companions. Certainly not enough of a priority to share these kinds of details with.”</p><p>Hilda huffs,</p><p>“Don’t get cross. You very well know I enjoy your company. And you also very well know you’re the only one I let take my clothes off.” Hilda pauses as she blushes. She scans Lilith’s searching face and says contritely, “I suppose I just didn’t think you’d be interested.” </p><p>Lilith clicks her tongue and crosses her arms, says,</p><p>“Well I am. Interested, that is. For the record.” </p><p>Hilda hums, thinks, says,</p><p>“I’m sorry, pet. I never meant to purposely not include you. It was a misinformed and thoughtless oversight.” Lilith raises an eyebrow, and Hilda says, “Would you like to attend?”</p><p>“Of course I would. I like to know what you’re up to. And you know I love your singing voice.”</p><p>Hilda processes this declaration for a second, says,</p><p>“Oh. Well. In that case. Zelda can make it only to dress. Sabrina and Ambrose are going Friday. Does the Saturday matinee work for you?”</p><p>“Yes. But. It’s a long show. I’m not sure I’ll be able to stay for the whole thing.”</p><p>“I play the Baker’s Wife, so I die in the middle of the second act. You can take a little rest after that and come back at the end to bring me flowers.”</p><p>Lilith laughs,</p><p>“Roses?”</p><p>“Traditionally, yes. But I love a surprise.” </p><p>Lilith steps closer, presses herself against Hilda:</p><p>“Don’t you just?”</p><p>Hilda winds her hands around Lilith’s neck, pulls her in. They kiss languidly for a moment, and then Hilda says against Lilith’s mouth,</p><p>“And the best part is, you’ll be materializing and dematerializing and rematerializing, so I won’t have to waste any of my comp tickets on you.”</p><p>Lilith kisses her again, just as slow and lazy and then says,</p><p>“So you can distribute them to your actual top five companions?”</p><p>“You could very easily move ahead in the rankings if you didn’t talk so much.”</p><p>“How would you have me use my mouth instead?”</p><p>xxx</p><p>Saturday afternoon and perhaps a sticky bun or four.</p><p>Hilda, even against the bright lights—but of course she’s looking out intently, searching—picks out Lilith’s bored face in the darkness of the audience. But then her scanning eyes also stumble upon Lilith’s elated face two rows up from the other Lilith. </p><p>Oh.</p><p>Oh no.</p><p>One of them is Lilith and one of them is Mary Wardwell.</p><p>It’s act one, and she’s not sure which is which. She’s singing mechanically about very nice princes as she contemplates: they’re both dressed equally conservatively. And they both equally perk up a tad whenever she’s on stage. </p><p>It’s six to one half dozen to the other at this point.</p><p>She means to investigate at intermission, but the girl who’s portraying Little Red Riding Hood has stepped wrong in her character shoes and has ripped her cape, therefore requiring her attention and expertise to repair it, not to mention her calming effect to get her back into the right frame of mind to perform.</p><p>By the time it’s act two and there are sexy moments in the woods, Hilda’s still uncertain. Both Liliths are looking at her with the same amount of admiration.</p><p>A scene and a half before the finale, Hilda wonders whether she should. This could end badly. But she knows Lilith would be disappointed if she didn’t. She whispers at her dressing table, </p><p>“Lilith, I summon you.”</p><p>Finale and curtain call. She spots both Liliths, each clapping politely.</p><p>In the lobby in the receiving line, Hilda is anxious. All things considered, she’d rather not be here, but it’s expected of her, so she’s here, shifting from foot to foot, waiting for her sins to come home to roost.</p><p>As the auditorium lets out, she lets her eyes roam over all the occupants as they exit. She perceives the two Liliths, the one who is lagging behind clutching a bouquet of sunflowers. Surely that’s Lilith, and the empty-handed one a score of people ahead of her is surely Mary Wardwell.</p><p>She shakes a lot of hands in the meantime, accepts a lot of praise.</p><p>And here’s actual real Mary Wardwell, smelling and feeling just like always. This physical body that Hilda knows but shouldn’t know.</p><p>“You were the standout performance,” Mary says as she clutches Hilda’s hand. It’s a warm hand but not as hot as Lilith’s supernatural skin. “I’d watch you in anything.”</p><p>“Oh? Thank you,” Hilda says.</p><p>There’s a bottleneck because of this protraction, and the people behind Mary visibly get impatient and bypass Hilda, go around to the next actor. Person and person and person. Until the next person in line is Lilith with her bouquet of ridiculous flowers. Hilda accidentally cuts her eyes toward Lilith, and Mary’s eyes follow.</p><p>Mary and Lilith lock eyes. See each other. Regard each other.</p><p>“Hkhello,” Lilith says to Mary. “Yhkou are verrhy attracktivk hkwoman, much like me.”</p><p>Hilda coughs to hide her discomfort. She recognizes what Lilith’s trying to do. She doesn’t approve exactly, but she gets it. She says,</p><p>“Miss Wardwell, this is my Latvian girlfriend I met online.”</p><p>Lilith and Mary shake hands.</p><p>But Mary’s face is still so flabbergasted. </p><p>Mary leans in, says confidentiality into Hilda’s ear,</p><p>“If you seek out women who look exactly like me, why haven’t you asked me out?”</p>
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